Turn Down the Noise: Learning to Hear What Really Matters

Strip it all back. Remove the distractions. Unsubscribe. Turn down, or even turn off, the volume of the chatter around you and within you.

That’s part of a conversation I had with a friend the other day, and it’s something I’ve found myself thinking about ever since.

For far too long, the noise around me and the noise within me have been hindering my progress. I’ve been giving too many people, including myself, too much space in my head, allowing too many opinions, expectations, and ideas from other people to influence how I think certain parts of my life and ministry should look.

I haven’t completely stopped doing that, and I’m not pretending I’ve suddenly figured it

all out, but I’ve started to realise just how much noise I’ve been carrying around with me.

Sometimes you don’t realise how loud something has become until you finally turn the volume down.

Not Everyone Needs to Know Everything

One of the things I’ve been learning lately is that not everyone needs to know everything.

I’ve just started a project that has actually been years in the making. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve said out loud that I’m going to do this particular thing, only for it to become something I talk about more than I actually do.

But this time feels different.

I’m deliberately not going into detail, not because it’s some big secret, and not because I don’t value the people around me, but because I’m learning that sometimes things need a bit of space to grow before they need an audience.

There have been so many times when I’ve shared something I’m thinking about doing, only to then have lots of different opinions about it. Before I know it, I’m questioning something I was actually quite sure about in the first place.

Someone means well and asks a question. Someone else gives me some advice. Someone tells me about something similar they tried that didn’t work. Someone else has an opinion about how I should approach it.

And while I appreciate it all, suddenly something that started with excitement and clarity is buried underneath everybody else’s thoughts.

Not Every Opinion Needs Your Attention

I’m not saying we shouldn’t listen to people. We absolutely should.

There are people in my life whose wisdom I need, whose questions I need, whose honesty I need, and who I trust enough to challenge me when I’m heading in the wrong direction. We all need people like that.

But I’m learning that there is a difference between listening to wise counsel and allowing every voice to have influence over you.

Not every opinion needs to become an instruction. Not every criticism needs a response. Not every suggestion needs to be acted upon. And not everyone needs to have a voice in every area of your life.

We sometimes confuse being open with being accessible to everyone, but those two things aren’t necessarily the same.

You can be open to advice without asking everyone for their opinion. You can be teachable without being easily led. You can listen to people without allowing them to dictate the direction you take.

And perhaps most importantly, you can keep some things to yourself without feeling guilty about it.

I’m learning that privacy isn’t secrecy. Sometimes it’s simply wisdom.

There are things I’ve spoken about far too early in the past, things that probably needed more time, more prayer, more thought, and more work before I started telling everyone what I was going to do with them.

Because talking about something can sometimes give us the feeling that we’re making progress when actually we haven’t done anything yet.

I know I’ve been guilty of this. I’ve talked about things I wanted to do, told people what I was planning, explained the vision, and got excited about what it could become, only to find myself months later still talking about it.

There comes a point where you have to stop announcing what you’re going to do and actually start doing it.

Maybe not everything needs to be announced. Maybe some things just need to be worked on quietly. Maybe some things need to become before they are shared.

Knowing When to Speak

And I think that applies to more than projects. It applies to us as people as well.

I’ve also been learning when to speak up and when to stay silent, and if I’m honest, I’ve probably spent far too much of my life getting those two things the wrong way round.

I’ve stayed silent when I should have spoken up, probably because I was worried about what people would think, worried about causing a problem or simply trying to keep the peace.

And then I’ve spoken up when I should probably have stayed quiet, usually because I felt like I needed to explain myself, defend myself or make sure somebody understood my point of view.

I’m learning that maturity isn’t simply about finding your voice. Sometimes it’s about knowing when your voice is actually needed.

There are moments when speaking up is necessary and courageous, and there are moments when silence is the wiser response. There are conversations that need to happen and conversations that probably don’t. There are things that need to be said and things we would be better off leaving unsaid.

Working out which is which is something I’m still learning.

Perhaps that is part of what turning down the chatter actually means.

It’s not about shutting everybody out or deciding that nobody has anything worth saying. It’s about becoming more intentional about what you listen to.

It’s about recognising which voices bring wisdom and which ones simply bring noise. It’s about recognising when the voice in your own head has become louder than the voice of truth.

And, for me, it’s about stepping away from the constant opinions, comparisons, expectations, and distractions long enough to work out what I believe, what I want, where I’m going, and what God is saying.

Because how are we supposed to hear clearly when everything is turned up to full volume?

Maybe You Need to Turn Some Things Down

Maybe that’s where some of us need to start.

Not with another new plan, another podcast, another book, another opinion or another conversation, but by turning some things down.

Maybe you need to unsubscribe from something.

Maybe you need to stop checking what everyone else is doing and comparing it to where you are.

Maybe you need to stop asking ten different people what they think about a decision you’ve already made.

Maybe you need to stop explaining yourself to people who have already decided they don’t understand you.

Maybe you need to have the conversation you’ve been avoiding.

Maybe you need to stop talking about the thing and actually start doing it.

Maybe you need to protect something that is still becoming.

Or maybe, like me, you simply need to create a little more silence.

I think there is something incredibly freeing about stripping things back to the basics and asking ourselves what actually matters.

What am I giving my attention to?

Whose voice am I listening to?

Whose voice have I allowed to influence me?

What am I carrying that I don’t actually need to carry?

What am I talking about that I should probably just get on with?

What am I staying silent about because I’m afraid of what people might think?

And perhaps the biggest question of all: what might I hear if I finally turned the volume down?

I don’t have all the answers to those questions, and I’m definitely still learning how to live them out myself.

But I do know that the less noise I allow around me, the more clearly I seem to see what is actually in front of me.

So maybe it’s time to strip it all back.

Turn down the chatter, both the external noise and the noise within you.

Be a little more careful about who you give access to your thoughts, your plans, and your decisions. Don’t feel like you have to share everything with everyone. Listen to the people you trust, but don’t feel the need to collect opinions from everybody.

Know when to speak, and learn when silence is the better choice.

Give some things the space to grow quietly.

And then, when the noise has finally become a little quieter, pay attention to what remains.

Because sometimes when you turn down the chatter, you realise you already knew what you needed to do.